Dear Aunty S

I have a wonderful daughter in law and a useless son.
He divorced her when the kids were little as he couldn’t stand being tied down.
He has never visited them or asked after them.
My daughter in law has a male friend and he is so kind to her and the kids.
She recently told my daughter in confidence that he wants to marry her but she will not marry him or live with him as she is scared I will be angry with her and walk out of their lives.
This couldn’t be further from the truth.
How do I tell her I would be overjoyed if she marries this man without betraying my daughter?

Aunty S responds

Take her out to lunch and out of the blue tell her how happy you are that she has found such a great man and how you will be even happier if they marry.
Try to look a little surprised when she says he has already asked her and then follow on with saying how she deserves all the happiness in the world, etc.
You are a treasure my dear.