Monthly Archives: January 2014

Ask Aunty S

askauntys2Dear Aunty S

My sister wants a tattoo and she has found a man who will do it for her as he works from home and does it cheap but  he is disgusting and dirty and I don’t know what to do.

My sister is thirteen and our parents wouldn’t actually  know about the tattoo because she is getting it on her back.

Should I tell them?


Aunty S responds

My dear boy you are a wonderful, caring young man.

If you can’t talk her out of it, please tell your folks.

They must stop her as she is at risk of a disease or two!

Actually I am frantically writing as your email scares me.

A friend of mine many years ago contracted a bloodborne disease from a backyard tattooist whilst another woman I know had a severe allergic reaction to the dye used.  Actually there are many stories I could relay but I think you get the picture.

In the news today we see all the young folk proudly showing their tats.  What we don’t see or hear about are all the ones that went tragically wrong.

Show your sister my response.

I am quite happy to email her more info on the subject if she likes.

Keep being a protective brother.

Busy times

Sandra reporting in after a hectic January.

This is my 23rd Fruit Season and as usual I am thoroughly enjoying myself.

Ruby is my right hand man in the Fruit Stall whilst Sam is in charge of the day to day running of the Orchard so everything is running smoothly.
It can be very hectic at times but all is going well.

There has been no spare time to get back onto my laptop as we all dive out of bed at 4am to greet the day.

I am so pooped by the end of the day; I am the first one to bed and often sneak away as early as 7pm.
In my defence I’m old!!!!!!!
I can’t believe I used to do such long days!! Ah ah ah.

And can you believe the summer we’ve had so far???….I feel so guilty whining as the poor folk in England, America and Australia, to name a few countries, have had appalling weather conditions during January.
Homes lost, livelihoods lost, lives lost……
All too sad.

For us February will probably bring us warmer weather, which will be a welcome relief.
Ruby has taken over bottling again this season.
She is a ‘little mini me’ as I used to have that enthusiasm.
Not these days though.
I marvel at having such a wonderful daughter.

We are once again hosting Wwoofers and so far this season we have hosted Jasna, Derrick and Vivienne
Such wonderful young people.
They are all from the Northern Hemisphere so I haven’t had to apologize too much for the weather as their home countries are in the throes of winter and our cold summer is still much warmer than what they would be enduring if they were at home.

This Fruit Season has brought much sadness once again; many customers have not returned as they departed from this Earth during the year.
We have met hundreds and hundreds of wonderful folk throughout the years and each passing is just so sad.
The other day a dear customer/friend, Avis, passed away suddenly.
We looked forward to her visits when she came for her Moorparks and Peaches faithfully each and every year and assumed we would see her again this season.
How wrong we were.
We shed many tears when she lost her Jim a few years ago, and now we shed the same amount of tears this time round.

I have been replying personally to my ‘Aunty S’ column and will post some of them as time permits.

A big thank you for all the emails during my absence during January and as an added bonus, I have been pleasantly surprised to discover how many customers read my blog.
Thanks ever so much for all the positive feedback.

I have found getting back into writing has been so therapeutic which is of course why Sam and Ruby talked me into writing a blog.

To be honest I didn’t even know what a blog was until they sat me down and described it blow by blow.
Ruby is my ‘moderator’ so she checks for spam and indecent comments daily.
Can you believe it; I an old lady of nearly 60, receives the odd vulgar comment!!   Strange world.
Ruby protects me from all this!!!
Isn’t she wonderful?

Sam made the blog for me. I described it and he built it to perfection!
My wonderful son.

As Aunty Belle always says to me, “Our kids Mum” with such a proud look on her face , as she cuddles me ever so tightly.   She may have very limited speech but can always convey her pride in Sam and Ruby whom she loves to bits.

Alex would have loved my blog as I used to write under a pseudonym in my younger days when I was a teeny tiny bit of a controversial writer.
He was always proud of my writings and insisted I put my name to each piece but of course being the coward I was, I didn’t.
But hey I did generate a lot of conversation though!!
That was enough for me.
He was so supportive.
How I miss him!!!

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if you planted hope today


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Ask Aunty S


Dear Aunty S

I have a problem with my sister who keeps trying to set me up with her girlfriends.

I am a bachelor and not interested in finding a girlfriend as my work keeps me happy.

How do I get her off my back?


Aunty S responds:

What a wonderful sister you have as she genuinely believes you will be only be complete with a girlfriend/wife in your life and she is determined to find you one!

Of course she is wrong, as you are happy being on your own.

Take her out to dinner at a posh restaurant and after you have fed her, tell her that you love her to bits and that she is the best sister in the world but then be both firm and kind and tell her very gently that you will find somebody when and if you feel the need for a girlfriend/wife/companion so she need not match make any longer!

Remember not many men have such a wonderful devoted sister so please don’t get angry as this will simply devastate her as she has always acted in what she assumed was your best interests.

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Ask Aunty S

Dear Aunty S

My mother lives alone in a large house and cannot keep up with the housework.

Her fridge has old food in it and she hasn’t cleaned the carpets in years.

I want her to move to a Retirement Village but she refuses.

She has enough money to buy a new home without selling up so could move instantly.

Any ideas as to how to make her see sense?


Aunty S Responds:

What about hiring a ‘home help’ to go in once or twice a week?

You could share the cost amongst your family or siblings.

Are there any grandchildren who could mow Nana’s lawn?

You describe her as having all her facilities so I can understand her reluctance to move.

I’m in my 60th year and I’m afraid there are things I can’t do anymore as old age has certainly caught up with me!

You sound like a caring, concerned daughter but my darling you need to stop worrying, as I am sure your Mum will know when it’s time, if ever, to move into a Retirement Home.

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Ask Aunty S


Dear Aunty S

I often spend Xmas holiday with my kids but this year my ex wife has taken them on holiday to the beach.

They were given the choice of going with me or the beach, and they chose the beach.

I am angry with my ex for bribing them like this, as I can’t compete with extravagant holidays.

What can I do to stop her in the future?


Aunty S Responds:

You won’t like my answer I’m afraid.

This has got to be about the kids and the added information you have given is that your ex is actually thinking of the kids.

This holiday that she has taken them on is an adventure and what kid wouldn’t want an adventure and certainly isn’t extravagant.

Be happy that your ex is prepared to rough it to make the kids happy and to ‘memory make.’  Tenting is hard work!!!!

Imagine if she was the type of mother who is quite happy to sit at home with a bottle of gin with the backdoor open for the kids to play in the street!

You and your new partner have a new baby so focus on your new life.

Furthermore, your ex has never stopped you from seeing your kids so don’t rock the boat.

The fact that the kids are coming to you for the last two weeks of the school holidays should make you a happy Dad.

One day soon they will be of an age where they will take stock of all the drama of their childhood so now is the time to make up for breaking up the family unit by not creating more drama in their lives, as they certainly didn’t ask to be in this situation nor did your ex-wife.

Keep being a good Dad to all three of your children.

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Happy New Year





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